I know from talking to many single parents, and from my own experience, that single moms and dads have a lot of stress from having to do it all. However, it is possible to reduce the doing-it-all stress of single parenting.
Some stress reduction strategies require taking action steps like creating a support network, asking for help, and making sure you practice good Self care. Some stress correction techniques require that you entertain a certain attitude shift.
Let’s face it, we parents do not like it when kids give us “attitude.” What’s to like about that? Well, there’s also very little to like about the “attitude” you are giving yourself. If you feel like a victim, if you feel like you have gotten a crappy deal, if you feel like you don’t deserve this overwhelming life, you are doing a number on yourself, and trust me–I can relate.
In Soul Mothers’ Wisdom: Seven Insights for the Single Mother, I write about “Katy’s Lessons.” Katy was a friend who stayed with me when I first became a single mother. She tried to help me shift my thinking into more uplifting insights, but I gave Katy a lot of “attitude.” All I wanted someone to rescue me from my new really hard life.
It took many important experiences and other lessons to help me learn what Katy was trying to teach me. For all of us it takes healing voices and the willingness to absorb their lessons is a major factor in how you understand and feel about your life and your Self.
Your intention to cut through the misconceptions and mistruths of negative self-talk, and your desire to feel better about yourself and about your single parent life can be strong motivation to shift your attitude and to start living a more fulfilling life.
Your revised attitude–one day at a time–will also benefit your children. When parents do better kids do better. Keeping the kids in mind is bound to help you change your thinking, shift your emotional state and reduce your stress.
You can find strategies and tips for reducing stress and shifting thinking in Soul Mothers’ Wisdom.