Mom’s have stress. It is a fact of life. The BETCHA process, a simple solution for beating stress, can calm you and help you focus more clearly on the parenting situation–or any situation. Just follow these simple steps.
1. Step One: Breathe. Your breath is the pathway to calming your mind and taming your stress. Conscious attention to your breath improves focus and brings about relaxation. With a calmer mind, you can concentrate on how to solve the problem at hand. You can accompany your gentle breathing with the following affirmation:
“Every time I breathe in I heal my body. Every time I breathe out I heal my mind.”
2. Step Two: Evaluate. Next ask yourself, “What am I thinking and feeling about what is going on. What would my typical reaction be? Would that be helpful in this situation? What are the supports and skills I need to solve this problem?” Paying attention to your thoughts and emotions when you are in a calmer place, can jump start your intuition and bring about insights into the issue.
3. Step Three: Think about the facts. Now consider the facts of the situation. Often things are happening fast when kids are involved, so your calmer mind and your awareness of your thoughts and feelings will help you. As you think about what it is you want to accomplish in addressing the facts of this situation, stay aware of your emotions too. Ask yourself. “What is my desired outcome?” Now listen to your inner voice. Your intuition is part of your thinking. With a calmer mind your intuition can continue to inform you with “gut” feelings that can help you recognize and select a strategy.
4. Step Four: Choose. You have calmed yourself, evaluated the situation, taken into account thoughts and feelings, thought about solutions and consulted your intuition. You are now ready to choose an action. In doing so, consider carefully your intended outcome. If disciplinary measures are to be taken, be sure you choose those that match the problem and do not cause undo stress on you as a parent.
5. Step Five: Use a Heart approach. Notice ideas that seem to one from an inner sense of knowing what is right. This is the way to bring in your heart and develop more wisdom in your parenting and your stress beating methods. Using the heart approach in combination with factual evaluation is a powerful duet of skills for becoming a stress beating mom. You can use this affirmation to access the heart approach.
“I now stay focused with the higher good of my children, myself, and all those involved.”
6. Step Six: Act. By following the preceding steps, you have greater knowledge for acting in ways that appropriately beat your stress, and handle each situation more smoothly and comfortably. You are now prepared to take correct action. Be sure to do another evaluation after you have acted, in order that each action become information for the next stress beating opportunity.
As you become more adept at these steps, you will find they come more automatically, and you will find you are using them in more of your parenting, and life, situations.
BETCHA can take you into new territory for learning how to live life more calmly while becoming a stress conquering mom!