Regardless of the how life directs your path, the Self is ever striving toward a sense of wholeness, even when we don’t know it. In my soon-to-be-published book, “Soul Mothers’ Wisdom” I emphasize the idea that single motherhood can be a blessed journey to a destination of maturity and strength of your authentic Self.
I have learned through my own experience and by discovering the courage and strength of the many single moms with whom I have spoken, that there are key elements that comprise the strength and maturity of single mothers. Many, if not most, of these features overlap with personal maturity in general. However, they are crucial factors to the successful survival and well being of single moms and their children.
So now, as you prepare to reflect on four of my key elements of maturity and strength, you might want to remind yourself that no one is perfect, and that these are ideals. As you go about the days and tasks of your life, perhaps you will find other aspects of your Self that you consider crucial for becoming strong and mature. Here are four of my top picks!
1. Trust in your Self worth.
Although being the object of high regard from others is a wonderful thing, your Self-esteem is an “inside job” and is not dependent on others’ approval.
2. The ability to use “mother’s intuition” along with clear thinking.
You know how to consider the advice and suggestions of others; and then base your parenting decisions on your careful reasoning of all information, as well as on the guidance of your wise intuitive voice.
3. The ability to know what you can control, and what you can’t.
Your focus centers on the well-being of your children and yourself. You can, and hopefully do, co-parent with your children’s other parent, but you know you cannot control what goes on in the other household, or in another person’s head.
4. The ability to view change and adversity as opportunities for growth.
You have a toolkit of coping strategies that keep you going when the going gets rough. You see the tough times as growth periods and this belief system empowers rather than debilitates you. You are not hard on yourself when life gets hard.
I would love you to write and tell me your stories and how they reveal the strength and maturity of your wholeness, your authentic Self. What characteristics of a strong single mother would you add to this list?
Thanks heaps for this post Bette! Super helpful and I’ll be keeping an eye out for your book.
Although I’m technically not a single mother until the baby’s born in Feb, I would add ‘Sense of Humour’ to this list – it’s already been my most helpful coping mechanism so far!